Minor punctuation errors have been changed without notice. Printer errors have been changed and are listed at the end.
The Colored Girl Beautiful
E. AZALIA HACKLEY
Author of "A Guide in Voice Culture" and "Public School Lessons in Voice Culture."
BURTON PUBLISHING COMPANY PUBLISHERS KANSAS CITY, MISSOURI
Copyrighted 1916 By E. Azalia Hackley
To colored women in whom I have faith and to colored children whom I love, I send this little message.
This volume has been compiled from talks given to girls in colored boarding schools. The first talk was given at the Tuskegee Institute at the request of the Dean of the Girls' Department.
It was an impromptu talk after an hour's notice. Just before the Dean closed the door to leave me alone with the girls, I repeated my question, "What shall I talk about?" The reply was, "Tell them anything you think they should know. They will believe an experienced woman like you who travels and knows the world and life."
As I looked at the sea of faces, "wanting to know," and as I thought of all they had to learn, the vastness of all of it almost overpowered me. "May I sit down, girls? Now, what shall we talk about that is interesting to every one of you?"
"Would you like to talk about Love—real Love?" "Yes, yes," came the answer. "Would you like to talk about Beauty—real Beauty?" "Yes! Yes!" they answered and the chairs were pulled forward. For forty minutes we had a heart to heart talk. The dean and teachers had perhaps told the girls the same words, but the message seemed to come more directly to them from one who had daily contact with the great, busy world.
The talks were very informal and personal and as the girls asked questions the thought came to me to jot down the points, that similar talks might be given to the girls in other schools. Then came the request, "You come so seldom, can you print the talks?" Much of the talks could not be printed because many of the questions and answers were personal.
If I had a daughter I would desire that she should know these things and more, that she might be a beacon light to her home and to the race. As I have not been blessed with a daughter, I send these thoughts to the daughters of other colored women, hoping that among them there is some new thought worthy of a racial "Amen."
E. AZALIA HACKLEY.
Chicago, Ill., August, 1916.
The Future Page 17
The Colored Child Beautiful 23
The Colored Girl Beautiful 41
Laws Of Attraction—Vibrations 55
Personal Appearance 71
Deep Breathing 79
Youth And Maturity 97
Self Control 101
Her Relationship With Men 109
The Religion Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 117
The School Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 133
The Home Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 143
The Colored Working Girl Beautiful 151
The Colored Woman Beautiful 161
The Colored Wife Beautiful 169
The Colored Mother Beautiful 181
The beautiful part about the colored race in America, is the future. As a mixed race we are undeveloped. We may become whatever we WILL to become.
This race is a growing people. The future is veiled but it may reveal some strange things to the world. What opportunities there are for leadership! If there were only some ways to "squelch" the fakers and arouse the dreamers!
If each would only think out a different plan for race advancement, there would always be followers. Some would be attracted in one way and others reached in another way, and so carry lines of thought.
The gardener is aiming towards better vegetation. Scrubs and dwarfs are sacrificed totally to produce a more perfect plant.
The horse breeder, any animal breeder, the bird fancier, all aim to get a better breed of stock in each generation.
The cry of the hour is "A better breed of babies." As it takes several generations to breed a prize winner, it is time for the colored race to look into these things and prepare for the future colored child, handicapped as it will be. Nature needs assistance in this.
Attractiveness in appearance is a strong factor in success. A pleasing, even, charming personal appearance may be cultivated.
The mind—the gray matter—either fills the body with life or beauty, or it destroys life and beauty, according to the concentration of thought, and resulting habits.
If one were to ask, "Can a leopard change its spots," the reply must always be, "No." But if one were to ask if the Negro could change his appearance, through himself, his own will power, the answer would be, "Yes," because the Negro has a thinking brain. He may become as attractive as he wills to become.
As his taste and ideas of beauty conform to the accepted, so will he grow like these ideals and standards.
The Colored Child Beautiful.
Every baby is beautiful to its mother. Every colored baby is generally, only cunning or cute to many of the white race who have their own ideal of baby beauty, which depends mainly upon a white skin.
Beauty is a matter of personal opinion. To a savage African, a baby with a black skin and flat nose is the ideal.
To a Chinese, a plump, yellow, slant eyed baby satisfies.
To the Esquimaux, the round faced, small eyed, black haired little one is the admired type.
A child should be taught to love and be proud of its race and to know the good points of the race.
Colored babies are born with rare physical gifts. First: They are born with the most beautiful eyes in the world. Unlike foreign children who come to this country, they seldom have sore eyes. I have visited about six hundred colored schools and have yet to see a sore eyed colored child.
The obligation of a gift is the preservation and cultivation of this gift. Little colored children should be taught to keep their eyes open and bright with intelligence and clear with good health, because the eyes are the windows of the soul. Their eyes should look straight into the eyes of others with their souls shining through. Their eyes must be kind eyes, listening eyes, observant eyes, thoughtful eyes, and remembering eyes.
Second: Colored people are credited with having the finest teeth in the world. The obligation of this gift is cleanliness and preservation of this attractive gift. A colored child should be taught to deny herself to pay a dentist's bill.
Third: Colored people have the finest voices in the world. The obligation of this gift is its cultivation, proper care and control of the voice, and to speak in good English.
There are other natural gifts but of them—later on. The greatest gift to the Negro is himself. So much in him is hidden, spiritually, intellectually, psychically and physically, that he is a vast unexplored mine.
All colored babies like all little white babies, excepting in the shades of color, are born about alike, with round or long heads, all with the same soft spot on the crown, and like white babies, are mostly all mouth because they are hungry little animals and use their mouths often.
As the child observes, thinks, and "wills," the bumps and hollows appear, the features develop and lines grow. Any ugly little baby may develop into a beautiful child. Any beautiful child may grow ugly and coarse.
If babies were born with developed features they would be monstrosities.
"Within each of them is an inward sculptor, Thought, who is a rapid, true workman."
Colored children should be taught that Thought will improve their good points and will eradicate any objectionable points. They should be taught their good points and their bad points, and should be encouraged to improve their personal appearance, as far as objectionable racial characteristics are concerned.
As the girl grows she should be taught the value of personal appearance as a factor in her life problem and ultimate success.
A little colored girl who wants to be pretty should be taught what "pretty" really is. The old proverb says, "Pretty is as pretty does," thus recognizing the power of the inward Sculptor Thought, and its controlling and cultivating forces.
At an early age the child should be given subjects to think about. She should be taught to see the beautiful in Nature and Art that the reflection may be seen in her face and in her actions. Ask her if she saw the sun rise this morning or the sun set last night, or if she noticed the moon light, or the grandeur of the low black clouds, or the fleeciness of the soft white clouds; tell her to listen to the language of the birds and insects, and the sighing of the winds through the trees. Tell her to listen to the teeming of the earth and ask where and when the earth smells the sweetest. Teach her to walk and talk with Mother Nature and to recognize her voice in everything, until Nature will appear more, mean more, and teach more. Companionship with flowers and the cultivation of plants is to be recommended, even in the most congested flat life.
The colored child should be taught Negro History that she may be proud of her dark skin. It is a long interesting story way back to the days of Ethiopian glory, for the Negro is the sub-strata of that race. Tell the child how fair races from the North invaded Africa, and until today the present colored race can trace its black blood back to African kings and queens, and its white blood to the kings and queens of the Old World.[A]
Let her know that the black man was the author of much of the world's history, and that Moro, the capital of Ethiopia, was at one time the great seat of learning. She should be taught early in life to read Ancient History, that she may see what the black man has done for the world, that she may have pride in her black blood as well as in her white blood. Tell her the record of the Negro as a soldier, statesman, and explorer. Read to her about the brave part that he played in the war of 1812 and subsequent wars, even in the recent terrible war, he was among the bravest. Help her to make a scrap book that she may pass her knowledge on to others. While authorities in history say that a race once great, can never attain greatness again, as truly as the pendulum swings this mixed race will surely come into its own. The colored race comes from several lines of white ancestry, and as fruit is grafted to a finer degree of species, so the colored race will some day show its latent powers. The child of today is to be the mother of the great child that is to be, and each one must do her part to help prepare for the future great colored child.
Teach the colored girl about prejudice. Parents should read up the World's history of persecution and note the accounts of race and religious persecution in England, France, Germany, Russia, Turkey and Spain. Even today there is English hatred of the East Indian, Russian persecution of the Jew, and Turkish persecution of the Armenians. Then, too, Europeans are only just beginning to regard the Oriental nations as human beings. Prejudice is hard to explain and hard to conquer. It has taken generations in other instances and the world has always kicked the under dog. Tell the colored child how these other persecuted nations are conquering prejudice; tell her that each colored child must be a race missionary and prove her worth and powers, thus winning friends for the race.
She must be taught the application of the story of Esther to her race. Tell her that each colored girl may be an Esther, especially in all matters of cleanliness, manners, and self sacrifice, to advance and change the prevalent opinion of the Negro. Each colored woman, not only bears her own burden, but she bears the burden of posterity and the burden of the race. Each one must fit herself for the triple burden. Not even a talent should be used wholly for personal gain nor solely for present uses. Her education must be a process of development of powers not only to fit her for citizenship and life, but it must fit her for her race's burdens.
Some one has said:
"To educate a boy is but the education of an individual—but when one educates a girl, the education of a family results."
Every little colored girl, like every little white girl, wants to be beautiful. What is beauty? Beauty is a combination of personal appearance and charm, and it can not be purchased.
Each year the merchant takes stock and separates all the best articles, the medium articles, and the poor articles.
And so when one determines upon self improvement, she should take stock. She sums up her good points and her bad points. The good points she will accentuate and the bad points she will eradicate, unless Thought, the inward Sculptor has been at work too long. It is for this reason that little colored children should be taught early in life to think rightly.
"As the sprig is bent, so will the tree be."
Every thought, every emotion has an outward manifestation. Because people think, feel, and act, they leave marks of these in bodily lines and habits. Not only is the face a bulletin board, but as Schopenhauer says, "One's life may be his autobiography." One's life may even be read from his skeleton.
Sometimes certain thoughts and habits repeated and repeated leave spots. Spots always depreciate whether on wool, meat, wood, animals or people. Has the Negro any "Spots"? Other people think so. If these so-called "spots" will interfere with his future success in life then let him eradicate them with the inward Sculptor—Thought.
Is the dark skin a spot? Oh no, it is his history, his strength, as was Samson's hair. Because of his color he has powers and forces which could get him anything he desires in life if he would only begin while a child, to learn restraint, how to govern and control himself until he could accumulate sufficient will power to direct these forces for his own advancement.
Because of his color he has rare psychic powers which are not yet understood by himself or by the world.
What is the largest Spot? If one wishes to get a true estimate of himself he finds out what others ridicule concerning him.
What feature about the Negro is ridiculed the most? Why, the mouth. What is the matter with it? A large mouth is supposed to be the sign of generosity. No, but if it has thick lips and is a leaking mouth? If it hangs open too much? Only two classes of persons are excused from having open mouths, and these are children with adenoids and imbeciles. Every one else is supposed to keep his mouth shut most of the time.
The leaking mouth with the hanging under jaw causes a tendency to "leak" along other lines. One's business and personal affairs "leak" in street cars, public places, and on the streets to the detriment of the race.
Permitting the lips to hang, thickens them. They grow too heavy to hold up. Too much grinning and loud laughter will widen the mouth and loosen it. We do not desire small mouths, but we do not look attractive with "leaking mouths." Our mouths are improving. In the schools and college pictures we find unmistakable evidence that Thought is working wonders with the Negro mouth.
What is the next most ridiculed "Spot"? The nose. What is the matter with the noses? Large noses are said to be an indication of character and ability. Napoleon always selected the generals with large noses because he believed them to be more efficient. Oh, but the noses are often flat and have no hump.
Look at the hump of the Roman nose which indicates "fight." Look at the hump of the Indian nose which also indicates warlike tendencies. Take the Jewish nose. The hump means fight—a continual warfare for gold.
But the Negro has been a peaceful person, consequently he developed no nose hump. It is time that he developed a hump—a Negroid hump. He must pinch up, think up, will up, a hump. The time has come to fight, not only for rights, but for looks as well. He must build up a nose with more character, which can not be ridiculed. Grinning widens the nose and prevents its upward building, so grinning must cease.
In examining the pictures of graduates from the different schools, we find that Thought is changing the noses as well as the mouths. As the mouth and nose are changed, so will the whole expression of the face be changed.
The Negro's hair may be considered a "Spot" by some, but care and cultivation are changing this so-called "Spot" and more care and attention will work more wonderful results.[B]
His eyes and his teeth are good points and he has been given a magnificent backbone as well as a beautiful voice, although he often permits these gifts to degenerate.
Because God has given each colored girl a beautiful voice, she should be taught to speak in a soft mellow tone. She should speak eloquently and elegantly. If she screeches or yells and abuses her vocal cords, she will not only disgust people but she will lose her voice and have no beauty of tone to bequeath.
As the colored child has been made in the image of God, her poise should be erect and fearless. Nature bestowed the gift of a straight backbone.
The native African has always been straight like the pine sapling. In civilization his descendant permits his back to bend. The chest caves in, squeezing the heart, lungs and liver. One is more liable to pneumonia and tuberculosis, and can not fight them successfully as these organs have lost much of their vital force because of their cramped conditions.
Power is expressed in the way one carries her shoulders, and vitality is measured by breathing capacity.
One may sin against God and be forgiven, but Mother Nature never forgives the sin against her. Unto the third and fourth generation the punishment goes on for the abuse of the temple of the Soul.
[Footnote A: NOTE. The Bible and other books tell us that the Ethiopians were a prominent people before the time of Christ.
Recently in excavations pictures of Egyptian princes reigning 2900-2750 B. C. prove from their hair that they had Negro blood. America will have these proofs in the Boston Museum of Fine Arts.]
[Footnote B: NOTE. "Kinky hair is neither a disgraceful nor a shameful heredity. It is an honorable legacy from Africa. A kind Mother Nature protected her children from the torrid sun which kept the oils and waxes in a fluid state or else the hair would have dried up. The chemical action of the atmosphere caused a shrinking into spirals which further protected the uncovered heads from scorching."
Constant care of the hair will cause an improved condition of the texture which will in time be inherited.]
The Colored Girl Beautiful.
Every colored girl would like to be beautiful. The so-called beauty is but skin deep. A burn, a scar, a disease, and beauty is fled, although contour and other evidences might remain.
One can not remove bad looks with soap and water. Youth should be and is always attractive. It is after twenty-five that one begins to wish that she had been more careful in her youth, that she had controlled her powers, and that she had cultivated her good points and removed her "Spots."
A girl should study herself, learn her powers, and she will get the real beauty if she will deliberately and persistently train for it.
We look at the photos of beautiful, smiling, round-faced children and then at the tired, many-lined unhappy faces into which they have changed. Women delight in showing us photos to prove how beautiful they were when they were sweet sixteen. As we look, it is hard to believe. However, the camera, they say, always tells the truth, and we have later evidence before us.
The inward tools, Thoughts, have carved the ugly pictures on faces. Ignorance is a terrible curse along all lines. Many have not learned the secret of preserving their bodies, along with other studies, yet the savage nations care for their bodies.
Girls abuse their bodies; they eat too much or else the wrong kind of food, causing indigestion or other stomach and liver troubles. There is no room for the distended digestive organs and gorged stomachs and if these walls are stretched too often they lose their elasticity and the digestive juices go on a strike, causing eruptions on the face and a bad complexion, besides other complications which destroy beauty. Then, too, coarse or highly seasoned foods arouse other appetites through the law of sympathy.
Girls do not heed the signs of colds and complications peculiar to women. Operations are often necessary because of exposure and neglect of colds. The clothing is often too tight and pressure causes malignant growth and great suffering in after years.
A girl should keep her face as clean as a man's face after shaving, and her body should be correspondingly clean, that the gases and odors may escape, lest they take revenge upon her face. A girl should no more offer a foul odor of body or mouth or nose, than she would offer poison.
A girl must study her body and preserve it by attending to colds and diseases in time.
One who desires beauty should fight against a desire for intoxicants. There is nothing that coarsens the skin of some women so quickly as the habit of drinking beer. Chewing gum coarsens the muscles of the jaw and gives a downward trend that few faces can afford to wear.
The real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is always at work. One may buy artificial teeth, hair and limbs, but no cosmetics or massage will cover up the ravages of Thought. Every thought leaves its imprint and every emotion leaves its manifestation.
Beauty is not always a tangible something. Many people are called beautiful when they do not even own attractive features. Charm and personality throw a special light over the features, thus transforming them. Any one may cultivate charm and personality if she has not been born with them.
To be beautiful, one must fill her mind with beautiful thoughts. Impure thoughts, angry thoughts, unhappy thoughts, jealous thoughts, and cowardly thoughts will arise, but they must be driven away. Health suffers from these thoughts because they affect sleep and appetite. Lines appear upon the face as an index of interior troubles.
One must not only be careful of thinking detrimental things, but she must be careful of what she says to others, and of what she writes in letters, for writing a thought intensifies its influence.
Impure novels often lead girls astray or give them impure thoughts which are printed or published in their faces.
A girl should not affect boldness. It "sets" the muscles in the face and neck. One should affect modesty and purity even if one does not feel them, that they may enhance her looks.
Rough uncouth actions and gestures cause ugly lines in the face.
Not only is the face the bulletin board of habitual thought, but the body reflects thought through gestures and other movements.
Repose of manner and a soft voice are two of the greatest charms that a woman may possess. Restlessness is not only a sign of lost control, it gives a false idea to passers-by. Quietude gives a sense of power. Control is culture, and culture is a beauty point.
Some one has said that in the matter of first impression, "appearance is half and the voice is the other half." "Later you will be able to make one forget an unattractive appearance, but we never grow accustomed to a rasping voice." "Nothing in the world is so humiliating as to be a graceful and beautiful woman with a bad voice."
Talkativeness is another "Spot," and a sign of lost control. In public places, especially, it is a sign of ill breeding and bad taste. Good breeding should always keep a woman from loud talk. We must remove the stigma of loudness and coarseness that now rests upon the race. The less a person knows, the bigger noise she generally makes. The big touring car never makes the noise that a motor cycle does, nor does a great steamer make the fuss that a tug boat does. The deep stream is silent while the little brook babbles.
It is exceedingly vulgar to air one's opinions in street cars, railroad cars, or in any public place. A person who really knows anything does not parade his knowledge or his opinions.
While emotional people are generally attractive, yet the habit of the expression of the emotions could be turned to better account.
Lost Motion and Lost Emotion are the two great "wastes" of the race.
One not only enhances her beauty but one is really a Somebody or a Nobody according to the control she has over her mind and body. She must control her emotions as she does her appetite. Excessive emotion debilitates the system. Anger is poison to a woman's system. It causes a chemical action which upsets the stomach. The bite of an angry person is sometimes poisonous, because of this chemical change. A fit of anger may upset the whole digestive system, and may even cause death because blood is taken from the digestive system and many bodily functions cease. Any emotion causes the heart to beat faster.
There is health as well as beauty in self control. Culture is self control. The Colored Girl Beautiful should cultivate reposefulness. A display of emotion or restlessness indicates lost control.
There are only two classes of people who are excusable for disturbing large quantities of air in their movements. These are babies and lunatics, because neither have brain development nor mental control.
The colored girl beautiful must learn to sit still. She must learn to be methodical in order to have resting periods. She needs a few minutes each day for relaxation and repose. If she has not learned to relax, she should change her occupation at different periods of the day. She must train herself not to get excited. She must not quarrel or argue. She must train herself to be temper-immune, and not to permit others to upset her equilibrium.
A real lady never gets visibly angry. Anger drives away friends who really help to make us beautiful by giving us pleasant sensations.
One should be eternally feminine. One should not attempt athletics unless she is sure that her physique will endure this. A strain may wreck one's health and looks. Most women are built like watches—one thing wrong upsets the whole mechanism.
Observing the small courtesies in life makes one charming. Knowledge of the various forms of society etiquette has made many women popular and has placed them in an enviable social position. Real politeness comes from a kind heart, from good impulses and it ranks as a strong beauty point because it illumines the face.
If one is obliged to work out for a living she must remember that habit affects looks. If one is energetic and happy the face will reflect the content. If one shirks her duty and hates her work, her face will reflect discontent; her vital organs will weigh downward and affect her health, and her looks will suffer. One must affect enthusiasm in her work to stimulate the vital organs.
So the real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is always at work. A girl is her own beauty doctor and can work out her own beauty destiny. She may have everything in life that she wills, if she will only guide this inner workman.
A girl who lives in the back woods may make herself so choice and beautiful in the indescribable way, that her fame will spread miles away. She should bide her time, stay to herself until she has fully improved herself, mind and body, and she will reap her full reward.
Law of Attraction—Vibrations.
Every one of us has a magnet within which attracts others for good or evil, and which is attracted by good or evil. The old philosophers have given us many proverbs to bear out this truth. We have the saying, "Birds of a feather flock together."
The law of vibrations was studied centuries ago by the old wise men.
One attracts the kind of vibrations that one sends out. The Bible also has given us many commandments and injunctions to protect us from ourselves. We are told that one must love if one would be loved; "to cast thy bread upon the waters and it shall return to you," "as ye sow, so shall ye reap."
Whatever is projected returns sooner or later. One may not even send an evil thought as in an anonymous letter, valentine, or register an unexpressed wish without making herself liable to self punishment.
One's personality and thoughts, either good or evil, always surround her, "like a contagious cloud." A strong personality will influence a weaker personality just as a magnet attracts. Many are influenced because they vibrate similarly and many are influenced because they are attractable or weak.
Revivals, riots, political agitations and race prejudices are all evidences of the power of strong projections of thought. Race prejudice is the result of the vibrations of hate and anger sent out by strong minds. The world is what one makes it by the projection of one's thought. The magnetic, energetic, hearty person brings things about because he projects a stronger vibration of thought, will power and personality, whether in a hearty hand shake, sunny smile or display of interest.
By helping others we help ourselves. We must learn to give, give, give, in order to receive.
The sporting element and the under world recognize and fear the laws of vibrations. They know nothing of the laws but they have instinctive recognition of some force, which returns the act. They give because they desire luck. One may always receive help from them because they are afraid to refuse aid.
Washington Irving has said, "Happiness is a reflection." "Everybody's countenance is a mirror transmitting to others, its rays." If one makes a habit of sending out happy, loving thoughts, the face reflects the thought and gains in charm and beauty.
We must teach our minds to act upon the minds of others. We must learn the laws and obey them, that we may send out strong thoughts of peace and love to counteract the overwhelming tide of thought against us.
There are many kinds of love. There is filial love, platonic love, the love leading to marriage, and the greatest love of all, mother love. Too many desecrate love by regarding it as a pastime, or selling all that passes for it, for favors, attentions and support.
What is love? Many definitions could be given but the best answer is, "Love is the habit of giving the best in us." Some one has said that "Love is the easiest thing to make and the hardest to keep."
So much of the life force is wasted because people imagine they are in love.
Somehow, girls are given to "falling in love," first with one man, then with another. With each man there is the feminine desire to reciprocate in full measure for various courtesies.
What is the result?
The vital forces are willfully wasted.
Beauty needs powerful stimulants. No one could expect a tree to blossom into a beautiful mature form if the sap were withdrawn. Youth is the green apple period. One can never tell how a little green apple may develop. It may become full blown and rosy cheeked, or it may become worm eaten and cankered.
Girls permit boys and men to kiss and fondle them (as one woman has said, "to paw and claw them") and in turn they exert themselves to live up to what they imagine is expected of them, believing it to be a fair exchange for gifts and attention.
When hypnotists desire to take the will power from their subjects they use their hands in strokings.
Girls should not permit young men to caress them, to hold their hands, or to stroke their bodies. It is very weakening. It causes a girl to yield to temptation because it induces passiveness to the will of the projector.
There is no present which a boy or man could give to a girl which is worth the tiniest atom of this precious invisible life current. In after life she realizes her folly, but it is then too late to remedy it.
Often a perfectly pure minded girl in her youth wastes her life forces with one beau after another, innocently imagining it to be her duty because of the attentions that she receives. When she marries the "man among men to her," she finds that she can not hold his affections because of this waste, and often she sees another woman get the love that is her due, as a wife. At the time of life when maturity should give a full blown rose of a woman, she has dribbled out because she has been too ardent. She is worm eaten and cankered because she has devastated nature, and it is all her own fault.
It is a debatable question whether a girl who has kissed many men, and has thus wasted her vital forces would be a fit candidate for Motherhood, and, on the other hand whether a boy or man who steals the life forces from our girls is fit to be a father. A man has no more right to steal this precious beauty stimulant from a girl than he has to steal her clothes.
Every man knows that if the girl he escorts around will kiss him, that she has kissed the one who preceded him and will kiss the one who follows him. It is no wonder that many men marry girls who have not seemed so promiscuous. Many a good girl has been passed or misunderstood.
Colored girls should never sell their bodies and they should set a higher value upon their bodies in every way. Especially should they be known as "Hands off" girls.
No one would think of handling a rare flower and expect it to endure. The virgin soul is always likened to a flower.
If a young man after a few calls thinks that he is entitled to a goodnight kiss he should be speedily set right.
Any emotion or feeling diffusing the body has an effect upon health and upon beauty. An organ may become exhausted from the rush of blood caused by an impure thought.
Kissing excites passions until they become uncontrollable.
A girl must cultivate her will power along with charm and personal magnetism in order to become a beautiful woman. She must resist the temptation to scatter her vital forces, so that when she marries she may hold all of her powers for the man she desires to hold. She should patiently wait for her "prince" and aim to give him unkissed lips, and virginity of mind as well as of body. It will be a tremendous satisfaction in fulfilling the definition of Love and Motherhood, besides giving the real beauty.
When boys and men desire caresses and kisses, a girl should send a message to her Solar Plexus—her reflex nerve—to help her to say, "No." She should let no present tempt her to be fleeced of her beauty food.
In order to resist temptation, girls should be taught deep breathing, that the diaphragm and educated nerves may obey emergency orders. The practice of deep breathing is invaluable in the matter of resistance, and will back up the "I won't", "I won't", "I won't", "Hands off", "Hands off". A girl must hold her fists tightly and resist.
She must psychologize the mind with thoughts of resistance by practicing simple breathing movements, so that when temptation is imminent the holding of a deep breath will be her salvation. The action of her diaphragm and Solar Plexus will prevent any wavering.
To cultivate and hold vital strength, one must hoard every atom of vital strength. One may not even afford to write love letters in too warm a strain. One will not only be ashamed in after years when this particular fever has worn itself out, but one will then be conscious of wasted vital strength.
Beauty is so dependent upon vital strength that every atom of vital force is needed and none must be wasted.
Trifles show up the real character more than anything else, in clothes, or the care of the hair, teeth or finger nails. Personal appearance is one of the strongest factors in the beauty combination. After health, voice, and poise comes the value of dress as a beauty accessory. Dress has much to do with a man's classification of feminine beauty although he may not be dress informed. Many French women are considered beautiful because of charming dress accessories, which are generally immaculate and in harmony. A modest girl dresses modestly; a sensible person makes her clothes fit her person, her height, head, back view, side view, ankles and heels. A woman's dress soon tells the character of the wearer and betrays immorality. Even colors talk.
With many people, finery seems to mean good dressing, yet their clothes jar, cry out, even "scream out their unfitness and unwholesomeness, and betray their dishonesty, shame and sacrifice." Clothes show silliness, conceit, and selfishness more than any other thing, and often they shame a home, so a colored girl should study her individuality and her life position and dress accordingly. She should wear only becoming colors, and she might affect a certain color to her advantage. She should "cling" to what is becoming rather than follow exaggerated fashions. The exclusive dressers in high society study to get simple lines; with them severity in line is elegance. Such clothes wear several seasons. No one minds wearing a becoming style a long time. Few colored women can afford to keep up the pace of styles. There are women who live to dress no matter what the cost may be but they are not to be envied for this slavish passion.
A man wears a good suit several years and looks well. Colored women could plan their costumes that they might at least last two seasons. They should study to make the most of what they have on hand.
One good black dress still remains an asset to a wardrobe and most colored women look well in black especially if it is relieved by a becoming color.
In France only the "Boulevard" women and actresses wear the exaggerated styles that we see in the French fashion journals.
The Colored Girl Beautiful will take care of her clothes. She will learn to press and sponge, also the use of cleaning fluids, and to forbear from sitting carelessly on coats and other apparel.
Work clothes should be becoming in color and style. While one is buying or making she may as well select attractive models. When one is attired in unbecoming clothes, unconsciously the face reflects the thought in unbecoming lines. One's voice takes on a coarser, unbecoming tone, and the poise takes on an unbecoming attitude. For the same reason our girls should not wear men's old hats or paper bags on their heads.
One should aim to select something becoming that the face and body may always appear at their best. One must be on beauty parade ALL the time to get beauty lines.
Appropriate clothes should be worn at all times. Pink or blue satin or silk dresses should not be worn on Sunday or at church, even if one can afford them. It is bad taste and sets a bad example to poorer girls who sometimes sell their honor, even their lives for these perishable, inappropriate costumes.
In every mind there is a picture gallery of our friends and the people we meet. Sometimes the pictures that we carry are not the best ones. One is often caught unawares in soiled, unbecoming garments. It is not necessary in this day and time to give an ugly picture of ourselves.
We should be particular to give the best possible, most pleasing picture to others at all times. There should be no "being caught." One should be prepared early in the morning, any time of day, and all through the night.
On the streets and as the street cars pass our homes, colored people should give the best pictures possible of themselves, if they can not of the houses in which they live. We are a poor people but we can be quiet, clean, becomingly and fittingly dressed. We must stifle the desire to be conspicuous unless it is to be conspicuous by quietness.
The Greeks are quoted as saying, "A healthy soul can only live in a healthy body." People are beginning to see that to a great extent, intellectual vigor depends upon physical vigor.
Man is an air breathing animal.
Air is life. One may go without food and water for days but not many minutes without air.
Air is the most important factor in generating vital force and it is the best tonic in the world.
A large, deep, chest indicates Health, Strength and Vitality. The size of the chest indicates the size of the lungs. A narrow chest indicates cramped lungs, heart, digestive organs and a small diaphragm.
The diaphragm is the dome shaped breathing muscle which serves as a partition between the chest and abdominal organs. Its contraction causes development of the lungs and heart and at the same time the internal massage of the abdominal organs.
The lungs have been called the scavengers of the body for they take off poison which would kill us.
As the blood stores oxygen especially at night, windows should be kept open to prepare the body for the next day's duties.
"Exercise is the elixir of youth."
Many people do not exert themselves enough to open the millions of little lung cells. Mother Nature demands a heavy price for this neglect of her laws.
The heart is now recognized as a muscle which needs muscular exercise as other muscles need exercise.
The heart is very wonderful. Although it weighs only about eleven ounces it has each day a lifting strength of 120 tons to the height of a foot. With seventy beats of a pulse a minute, six ounces of blood are forced into arteries seventy times a minute or 187-1/2 gallons every hour. This could fill a lake or pond in a life time.
Deep breathing is the fundamental foundation of Physical Culture, of Singing and of Oratory. This is why these studies are recommended to lessen the susceptibility to disease especially tuberculosis and other lung diseases.
Deep breathing cures nervousness and many chronic complaints because it improves the circulation of the blood and causes internal massage especially of the abdominal organs.
Deep breathers are seldom mentally weak because deep breathing develops Will power. Its study causes pride in one's body and its physical gifts because it teaches the values and beauties of different parts of the body.
The habit of deep breathing cultivates Personality and Personal Magnetism and thus makes one attractive. A great deal of the success in life comes from winning people through Personal Magnetism.
A woman's mind should always be filled with a life plan, else she is in danger. A busy woman is generally a safe woman. She must find her life work and keep busy. Even a hobby is better than nothing if time hangs on her hands. She should do something with all her might and not delay, for Time is flying.
A colored woman especially should have some purpose in life to further race advancement. It should not only be a high purpose but it should be something real.
To be enthusiastic about something is beautifying because it stimulates the circulation of the blood. Any kind of success comes from enthusiasm.
No matter how poor a woman may be she may be original in her ideas. At first, of course, she must use the ideas of others, until she can show her cleverness through her adaptations, and employing her powers and gifts will add until larger powers and gifts result.
She must try to get a new line of work for race advancement and dedicate herself to it. If she eliminates the Ego (Self) and will aim to work for the good of others, she will succeed.
Each one should find a realm, something in which she shall be supreme, and be first. "It is better to be first in an Iberian village than second in Rome." The race needs daring original people, to think and speak.
Emerson says, "Every man has a call to do something unique."
The person who thinks up new lines of study, thought and ideas for the race, enlarging its vision and enriching its mind is a race benefactor. Ruskin's creed of work should be the universal creed. "The man or woman who does work worth doing is the man or woman who lives and breathes his work; with whom it is ever present in his or her soul; whose ambition is to do it well and feel rewarded by the thought of having done it well. That man, that woman, puts the whole country under an obligation."
Colored women have a genius for leadership. There is great executive force in them. Many a colored woman is an undeveloped genius waiting for opportunity. One should try avenue after avenue until the right one opens, for her life work.
In spite of criticism she must fight on, alone if necessary, "With God, one is a majority," said Frederick Douglass.
If one can not be a genius or be original, she may do anything near at hand. She should find something to do so that she will have something to talk about besides herself and her friends.
One might take up the study of music, voice culture, elocution, art, embroidery or housekeeping (domestic science) and pass it along to others.
The surest way to make people "take notice of one" is to work for others. One may also live in peoples' hearts as well as their minds, if she will ally herself with a good humanitarian cause.
If one is not what is termed religious, or is lacking in religious feeling, she should at least conceal this serious void by showing respect for religion in no unmistakable terms for the sake of example. One should always hold up Christian ideals even though she may not be a spiritual woman or be called an earthly saint. She can hold up for a more rigid moral code and the highest thought in ethics.
It pays to be respected, but after one has trusted and has been disappointed, deceived, and betrayed, she will find that it pays best to keep close to the "Cross" where that "One always listens and understands." One should not get too far away from "It" because one is certain to return sooner or later.
The best representative people go to church if only for example's sake. Even if one were not extremely religious she could be an authority on religions, reading up the history of other churches as well as one's own church discipline. One might originate prayers or "graces" for the table and sell printed copies for a local charity.
Any woman should be proud to espouse the cause of children and their broader education, as well as their health and happiness. One might try to bring a musical artist or lecturer to them every two or three years.
Every day of one's life there is an opportunity to make some one happy. One might amuse herself by keeping a diary of her efforts along this line.
Speech is a cultivated talent. One might study to be good company, not to be funny or witty, but she might study the art of expressing herself; not to air her knowledge, that would be vulgar, but to store her memory with a fund of information concerning the great paintings and works of art, and lives of great composers.
One might even be an authority on economy and demonstrate how to make over dresses, hats, etc.
One could economize on her wardrobe and travel on the savings giving little "Travelogues" to those less fortunate. There is an indescribable joy and satisfaction in serving others, even though the recipients are not grateful. It gives one a sense of power and wealth.
One might even cultivate her sensibilities and increase her knowledge of the beautiful in Nature and Art, to carry young folks upon little Nature and Art expeditions to the country or to museums. Permission might be granted to enter many closed doors. The word children is often an open sesame.
If one is tied down to life work inside her home, she may manufacture smiles and cultivate a beautiful speaking voice. It is a pleasant occupation to bring smiles to the faces of others. It is rather fascinating to try to change the expression of other people's faces by exaggerating the happy timbre in one's voice. Even if one may not do big things she may charge the atmosphere with smiles.
When I was a girl, an old friend used to say to me, "Never let people down you, always come up smiling." One may come up from troubles and bitterness with a forced smile until the smiling muscles act for themselves, automatically.
One may also cultivate good manners until she wins a wide reputation for real ladyship, and thus be an example. Only the uncertain are impolite; fear is their ruler. Those who own strength and power are always those who are gentle because they are sure of their life position. Real politeness is only an outward expression of the generous impulses of the heart; it is inborn. Politeness may be cultivated until it passes for the real thing.
Originality does not include exclusiveness. Exclusiveness is deadly to originality. The exclusive woman is seldom of service to the race, and she is not always a congenial or an agreeable person. She may live so much to herself that she is uninteresting as well as selfish. She touches nothing vital excepting books and has nothing else to talk about.
One should train herself to make a perfect social circle as far as she is able.
The display of wealth is never original—only vulgar—and only an inborn vulgar woman would place her so-called friends at a disadvantage by entertaining them beyond their power of return.
It is pathetic to watch the social efforts—"climbing"—of people with only money "Sans" brains and originality.
Youth and Maturity.
The two attractive periods in a woman's life are girlhood and maturity. If girlhood is not sufficiently attractive a girl may go into beauty training for maturity.
Many women who persevere in right thinking and right actions have three stages of attractiveness, youth, maturity, and old age.
A face that reflects nothing is seldom beautiful.
To be beautiful one must think more, love more, in the right way, and give more in the right way.
A girl should not try to get old and look old, for age comes to her soon enough. Girlhood comes but once in a lifetime. One must keep young by being young and "thinking young." One must never let tiredness leave its mark either in the face or poise. Tiredness has never attracted and when people say that one looks tired, it is time to smile and deny it, for the "Spot" is beginning to take form. The body should never be permitted to settle. In Cuba, the women have enormous hips because they sit so much and are inactive.
Each muscular movement should reflect health and youth until one feels hardy and young. One should breathe all the fresh air that she can consume. Breathing is a vital force which sends blood to fill out wrinkles and eradicate blemishes and spots.
The fair, fat, and forty age is no longer dreaded. Like Lillian Russell, women are learning to keep the face youthful by keeping the illusion of youth and the belief that she is youthful. If we feel young we look young.
"Will Power is the rudder of the ship of life."
A woman's life is about what she makes it. She is her own Fate. The law that governs one, governs all humanity, because the laws of thought are the laws of the universe. The mind and body are co-workers. "As a man thinks, so is he." Great men are those who see to it that the mental force is stronger than the material, and who "Will" that thought shall rule their world.
Every thought stimulates certain brain cells, and exercises some nerve, tissue or muscle. Man's superiority to animal is due to this mental action.
Actions speak louder than words. They are published thoughts. Every movement of every portion of the body has significance. Picking up a glass, a cup, or tools and other habits reflect the mind and its superiority to the physical. There is no surer way to judge people.
Every face tells a tale and we read character from the physical form—the head, the backbone, the eye, the mouth, the chin, or hand. The uplifted eye, the corners of the mouth, the manner in which one eats or stands, in fact every movement has a special meaning, which may be easily read.
The body is like a camera, it tells the truth; it is the outward sign of inward grace, or vice versa.
Some one has said "Women's characters are writ large on their faces and God writes a perfectly plain hand." Because women are more emotional than men and because they often indulge themselves in emotions, the signs are frequently very evident. If we study these signs when we meet others we may "size them up," and almost know what is passing through their minds. Because of sexual magnetism men read women more easily than they read men.
Mental habits soon become reflective or automatic. In order to read others we must study ourselves, discover our habits and tendencies and trace them to their source for correction.
The time has arrived for new thoughts, new studies, and new habits. Colored women must be led along the new lines of thinking. Although many have seemed stupid about some of the abstract studies, they have native powers that have too long lain dormant.
Many are permitting their forces to go to waste instead of controlling them. They must discipline themselves to gain self control over such habits as over-eating, coarseness, inertia, anger, and other beauty destroyers.
Any excessive emotion debilitates the nervous system and thus affects good looks.
Proper poise prolongs life because pressure on certain organs is evenly distributed and no strain is placed on any particular muscles to cause abscesses or tumors, etc. Improved circulation of the blood results, and good circulation spells health. One can think better when poise is correct for the same reason.
The conversation of people gives a pretty correct estimate of character. Complaints from people who are sorry for themselves is one of the tell-tale evidences of a weak character.
There is a present day need of knowledge concerning a certain contagion of emotions. Strong feeling sometimes vibrates that which is hostile and selfish. One fretful, scolding woman can upset a neighborhood, to say nothing of a household.
One's thoughts should be of love and peace, instead of worry and fear, lest she may harm others. A woman should be unafraid to conquer life's problems. She should have faith in herself or she will be a dreamer instead of a doer. She must be positive instead of negative, but be positive in the right way which includes the thought and help for others.
Voices reflect the mind and soul, so the colored woman should control the speaking voice.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox has said,
"Some voices affect us like music, Some voices arouse to action and ambition. Some voices fill you with despondency. Some voices irritate like a buzz-saw. Some voices snap like turtles, and some hiss like serpents."
Control of the speaking voice is one of the most admired evidences of self control.
The power of the mind over the body is said to be greater than any germ. Compelling the mind to perform some one useful disagreeable act each day is a splendid habit trainer. The influences that we exert over others will depend to a great extent upon the control over our own habits as well as the resistance to influence that others might exert over us.
One must conquer habits of laziness, untidiness, extravagance, voice, gestures, clothing, to gain power to concentrate Thought.
Her Relationship With Men.
Many girls think that they understand men, but they flatter themselves. Men do not always understand themselves, and often do things because they have been led to "the doing," by misunderstanding the girl.
A man likes to measure up to the opinion of sympathy, strength, protection, or wickedness, that he imagines a girl has of him. He often says and does things to please the girl more than to please himself.
Girls often throw out allurements and temptations especially in the way of immodest dress and seemingly innocent actions which have been the downfall of men as well as of themselves. While men have known that the temptations were deliberately planned, they have not had sufficient will power to resist. It is an unpardonable crime for a young girl to take such an advantage for frequently she ruins the career of a man. Such a girl has two souls to answer for when her own downfall is a sufficient burden to carry.
Some girls complain of insults from men. There are so many good reasons which could be given for this, but girls would indignantly deny that one reason is that they bring this upon themselves.
They discuss slippery subjects and personal experiences, and "heart longings" which call forth the ever present manly (masculine) sympathy. This often leads to actions afterwards regretted.
Men are good readers of the public bulletin—a girl's face. They see the mark of intoxicants, impure thoughts and other weaknesses as if they were spelled out on the features, and as they are keenly sensitive to projected vibrations, they act accordingly.
Sometimes dusk, or night's darkness is to blame for much mischief. Moral resistance seems to be at low ebb at this time, and an evidence of timidity or other feminine weakness may be misunderstood—read incorrectly as a feminine subterfuge seeking physical contact.
If one will always expect good from men—the men will generally rise to it. Try to believe that every man is chivalrous, but do not put his chivalry to too severe a test.
Curiosity and a too venturesome spirit may lead to mischief and trouble too great to be remedied. One must not think or project impure thoughts, nor must she expect insults and familiarities. Men generally respond to the (influencing) thought. They feel the thoughts and obey them.
Girls must remember that most men talk. Some will tell on girls if it is the last act of their lives, although they may not mean to tell. A newly married man will tell his wife, or another will tell his affinity. Another may drink too much and grow confidential. Some even talk in their sleep. One may not think that she will escape; her indiscretions will follow her to her lifelong regret.
She should not try to be a woman too early in life, and should not marry too early. She should study her physique and her constitution. She should not permit desire and curiosity to control her good sense. Long illness, suffering, operations, and even early death may result from premature responsibility. If necessary, she should consult a physician and look the future squarely in the face.
Girls do not now mature as early as their mothers and grandmothers did, and they have not the same power of endurance and resistance, because times, conditions, and the mode of living have changed.
Long engagements should not be encouraged. If a man wants a girl he will wait patiently without any coddling or coaxing. Long engagements are enervating. Engaged couples feel that they are licensed by public opinion and they tax their powers in a way that married people would not dare to do. Too much liberty in long engagements is so often a serious menace to health and happiness in after marriage relationship. It takes away the charm and bloom of married life because the man learns to know his fiancee too well.
The Religion of the Colored Girl Beautiful.
God is the perfection in all that is good. God is the best in us. God is the perfection of all that is beautiful, orderly and harmonious—the 100 per cent of everything in the world.
The religion of the colored girl beautiful should teach her that everything is spiritual—sacred—because everything comes from God.
It is not sufficient to say, "I am a Christian (I am spiritual—of the Spirit)" unless one expresses this in countless ways each day. Not only in kind, helpful actions and gentle speech, but in the work-a-day life.
The colored girl beautiful expresses her Christianity—her spirituality—the best, or 100 per cent in her, when she puts Christ into every act of her every day life. No act should be too insignificant for this expression.
The parables of Jesus teach us that He put His Spirit into the lowest act, as for instance in the parable of the tent-maker.
If the colored girl beautiful is truly of His Spirit she will spiritualize, light up her every day environment with the "Light" that is in her as a beacon to others as well as to show her appreciation of a priceless possession.
Each day she has innumerable opportunities to express the Christ in her—her spirituality—in the neatness of her apparel, and in the tidiness of her home and yard. She may take her religion—her Christ—into the kitchen and express Him and the 100 per cent spirituality in her cooking, sweeping, and in her dish washing.
Doing things well expresses the proportion of the Christ—the perfection—the 100 per cent in us. The more Christ one claims, the better should one express Christ in his daily labor as every-day evidence.
A low daily percentage is a poor record for one who claims spirituality on Sunday.
No untidy church, home, or school expresses Christ—for Christ represents perfection in cleanliness and order. "Cleanliness is next to Godliness" we are told. Cleanliness shows the spiritual, the God, but dirt in any form is an expression of the opposite. Dirt under a bed and a prayer beside it are not compatible, to say the least, unless the "pray-er" is unable to sweep.
The Christ principles properly interpreted and applied would spiritualize a broom and duster and all the utensils of a home or the tools of a trade.
Order is an expression of the God-part which makes us more orderly in the habits of life if we make pretensions as Christians.
God is not only all that is perfect in cleanliness, order and harmony, but He is also all that is perfect in color and sound. God is in the body and all its parts, the hair, teeth—all.
As harmony and color are expressions of Spirituality so good taste in dressing expresses the God in us. By observing and studying Nature one learns God's taste in color and what is harmonious.
We should dress to suit the color of the face and the physical attributes that have been given to us. God has appropriately garbed each object in Nature. Colored people should study themselves and dress accordingly. The bright, gay colors are not suitable to all. Many violate the laws of harmony of color, and unconsciously expose the ugliest in their appearance by wearing gaudy, unbecoming, inappropriate clothes.
As the harmony of sound comes from God, so an eloquent voice expresses God. Christians should make their voices more elegant and eloquent. A loud, coarse voice expresses the opposite of God. Coarseness in thought and speech is unlike Christ and serves to reveal opposite attributes to those He represents. Grunting is not spiritual. No one could imagine a grunt from Christ.
A graceful motion or gesture also reflects the God in us. One would never imagine any rough, uncouth gesture from Christ, who is the "pattern of patterns." Grimaces are not spiritual besides they leave lines in the face.
A respect for the rights of others expresses the God in us, as do obedience and kindness. We are told in positive language by God to respect our elders and superiors.
Race pride expresses the God in us. The Israelites were the chosen people because of blood ties. They were proud of their blood. Blood is thicker than water. The real Christian should be proud of his people; he should believe in them and uplift them as our Great Example did the lowly.
The reverence which expresses God will cause one to respect His house or any portion of it. A Christian would not handle a Bible carelessly and would dust it as a privilege, because it is the message from God. A Christian would not tear or disfigure any sacred book or selection of music, while to sit upon the sacred rail of the altar or pulpit would be an unpardonable act of sacrilege.
The proper care of any article belonging to the Sacred Service is an expression of Spirituality because it recognizes the article as a medium of spirituality, something which should be reverenced.
The singing of religious songs in any but a spiritual frame of mind would be sacrilege just as the taking of the Lord's name in ordinary conversation or in exclamation is sacrilege.
The same religion or Spirituality which makes one shout, pray and sing should prompt a girl not to wear a pale pink or blue satin dress or other inappropriate fancy decollete dress to worship in God's House. She cannot worship God and mammon at the same time and she should not be the means of distracting anyone from spiritual thoughts through envy or disgust.
The Christ in a person will prevent her from speech and action which would hurt the chances or success of another person. God has warned us that the violation of this rule will surely return evil to the violator. His law has many references to this particular self punishment.
It can not be denied that Divinity has specially endowed the Negro spiritually, but he does not consistently express it in all the forms that he might express it, especially in the great Race cause. He is full of heart, and will give his money, his food, his life, for God—but he does not yet realize that the same love for God that he puts into his gifts should be expressed and applied in his daily walks in life as Christ has expressly commanded.
We are taught that there are four kinds of Emotional Expression: The Egotistic which is self and in the interest of self as in joy, rapture and grief; the Aesthetic which has its expression in Nature and Art; the Ethical which has its expression in the moral law; the Religious which expression is in the faith of the Supreme Being.
As yet the Negro has only fully expressed himself in but two: The Egotistic, or the self interest, and the Religious, or the faith in the Supreme Being.
The Negro undoubtedly brought about his own freedom through his own spirituality, and faith, and the concentrated, united thought of a whole people upon one subject—freedom. His remarkable progress since emancipation has been due to the same faith.
The Negro should be, and could easily be the spiritual teacher—or example—of the world. He must not only prove his spirituality but he must diffuse it, that others may realize its power even if they may not receive its benefit.
Christ, the Supreme Example of spirituality was quiet. Other races hold that ideal, of spirituality. When they see and hear a Negro shout, weep and pray and then find that same person uncouth and dirty, they cannot reconcile the two conditions, and so doubt the spiritual element which they call Emotionalism. (They do not remember that the Spirit may be strong and the flesh weak.)
These critics cannot believe that an untidy, ignorant man with dirty teeth stained with tobacco juice can give spiritual advice, and one must admit that it does look incompatible.
The race needs more quality in Emotion and less quantity.
Once convince the rankest Negro hater that the Negro undoubtedly has spirituality, which is surely advancing him and the race, and a certain respect will follow.
Each Negro must consider himself a spiritual missionary whose appearance, speech, actions and surroundings will reflect the storehouse of the great Light within.
The colored ministers who preach Emotionalism, or what they term the expression of spirituality should see to it that their flocks spiritualize their daily lives causing cleaner churches, schools, homes, yards, wearing apparel and Christian thoroughness in each daily act, thus showing 100 per cent spirituality.
The colored ministers who preach Non-Emotionalism should prove that the power of spiritual expression is being directed along channels which are helping their flocks and the race in each daily act, not only in race progress but in convincing doubting Thomases who are blind to the good traits in the race.
The so-called Spiritual Power which would cause a woman to run down an aisle and mash the hats of others, or to throw hand bags and give similar evidences of strength and emotion could be turned into safer and more helpful channels—as far as her race is concerned. A woman possessed of this power and energy could be a great leader in great deeds if she were taught how to do this. A shouter who can not help the race in the battle against prejudice in her special locality, by expressing her spirituality in each daily word and act as well as apparel, and surroundings, seems a poor example of spiritual expression.
The religion that does not help toward the advancement of this persecuted race, and does not win the admiration and respect of other races, is not the religion for the colored girl beautiful, of today.
As a rule colored people expect entirely too much help from God. We must help ourselves more. Each Negro carries a three-fold burden; first, his own personal burden; second, the burden of his posterity; and third, the burden of the race. These follow each other and are dependent upon each other.
God has given him physical strength, a strong backbone and strong shoulders to carry the heavy yoke of the three-fold burden, as well as a wealth of spirituality to cheer him and keep his heart light, along the way of life.
The religion of the Negro should prompt less study of the desires of the personal Ego, and should teach other nations to respect his race, or, his religion is not spiritualizing as it could and should spiritualize.
The religion of the colored girl must be spiritual in every sense, that it may influence her every thought and act, and make her a true medium for race progress.
The School of the Colored Girl Beautiful.
"Education is the process of developing all man's powers, physical, intellectual, moral, aesthetic and religious for the proper discharge of the duties of citizenship."
The school that the colored girl beautiful should attend will have trees, grass, flowers, shrubs and a garden (even though a small one) that the girl may keep in close touch with the first teacher—Mother Nature.
The care of the school campus as well as the windows, fences, and surroundings, will reflect the careful spirit of the school.
The colored girl beautiful will select the school which fights flies, dirt, filth around back doors; the school which aims for sanitation before putting in electric lights; in fact, a school which has health and sanitation for its hobby.
She will attend a school that buys books and takes care of them and which compels the students to read that they may grow into the reading habit, to pass it along to posterity.
The progress of the race will depend not upon the "book learning" taught in schools, but upon the right habits formed and the amount of self culture that the school inspires.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught to keep her eyes open and her mouth shut that she may never betray how little she has really learned in her preparation for the real school—the school of Life.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught her duty and relationship to the race, that she may be a living example of what right education and right training will do. She will study human needs and about the history and progress of her people that she may take her place in the affairs of her race if called upon, and then bequeath her knowledge and good qualities to succeeding generations. She will be taught lessons of self-control and modesty; to respect her womanhood and to conduct herself that she may command respect from all men and boys including those of her family.
She will be taught enough of the world to step into its arena knowing the evils to shun. She will be taught to hold out a helping hand to weaker ones who may succumb to evil.
She will aim to live in pleasant relationship in the school that she may acquire the habit of living in peace in social circles and neighborhoods in the scheme of after life.
She will be taught that politeness is a necessary virtue; that every form of impoliteness is an evidence of mental as well as moral weakness and that an ill bred colored girl is a curse to the race. She will be taught the value of silence and that of speech, and will aim to train herself along both lines for silence is often more effective than speech.
She will learn that the aim of education is the aim of religion, that is, to lift one above the animal. She will endeavor to lift herself to the highest plane of true womanhood that she may pull others higher.
Colored schools are supposed to correct the tendencies of children who have lived under careless, untidy conditions, and to give them ideals of cleanliness and order.
She will do her part of the school work cheerfully and thoroughly, that she may know how work should be done, and how to train others—her children, perhaps, if so favored.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught the value and use of money, and the relative value of character, education, and other things, which money cannot buy. She will be taught the care and cleanliness of the body, simplicity of wearing apparel and appropriate becoming inconspicuous costumes for church, school, street and home.
She will be taught that fine clothes can not cover up bad manners, nor take the place of good character; that it is foolish to buy what one can not afford; that the expenditure for clothes especially should be gauged by one's salary and should be appropriate for her particular plane of life.
The laws of proportion in the scheme of life must be the hobby of the school for the colored girl beautiful.
She will be taught that it is unforgivable not to walk erect, to talk in good English and in a soft tone of voice.
As many girls fall into book ignorance after graduation she will be taught that the aim of education is to give good habits of reading along with book-knowledge—or else the school has failed to educate a colored girl beautiful.
The colored girl beautiful will not aim for book education alone. She will select a school which will fit her to grace her home from parlor to kitchen, a school which has thoroughness for its motto.
She will be taught how to make her dresses and hats, to prepare for the time when perhaps her allowance for clothes must be divided among several. Dressmaking is a science as well as an art and enough can be learned, by those not apt, to save many dollars—especially in the home that fate favors with children.
She will be taught a trade, or some means of earning a livelihood, that she may be prepared, if circumstances should force her into the business arena.
The school of the colored girl beautiful will so educate her that motherhood will be her highest ideal in life, the glory of colored womanhood.
The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful.
The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful will reflect her. She will help her parents to buy a home that it may give her family more standing in the civic community. Taste and simplicity will rule, for the home will harmonize with the girl. If her parents are not particular about the trifles in the way of curtains, fences, and yards, then it must be her special task to make the home represent the beautiful in her, the God, for all that is beautiful and good comes from God.
Windows generally express the character of the occupants of a house. The day has passed when soiled or ragged lace curtains are tolerated. The cheaper simpler scrims and cheese cloths which are easily laundered are now used by the best people.
The Colored Girl Beautiful, will study the possibilities of her home and will attempt to secure the restful effects for the eye. Too much furniture is bad taste. The less one has, the cleaner houses may be kept.
The ornate heavy furniture and the upholstered parlor sets are passing away because they are no longer considered good taste, besides they are too heavy for cleanliness and are harmful to the health of women who do their own work.
Furniture of less expensive model, with simple lines and of less weight are being selected. These may be paid for cash instead of "on time," as has been the custom of many people in smaller towns and in the country districts.
The furniture sold by the payment houses always shows its source in its heaviness and shininess.
The wall paper should be selected as one would select a color for clothes, to harmonize with the color of the skin in all lights, and, for service Color schemes in decoration are being followed and we have no more stuffy parlors, often closed for days. Instead we have living rooms, with cleanable furniture, strong but light, entirely suitable for winter, and cool in summer. No one has a parlor now-a-days. The best room is generally a living room for the whole family. No more do we see enlarged pictures which good taste demands should be placed in bed rooms and private sitting rooms. The ten cent stores have done a great deal of good in educating the poor white and black alike. These stores have every where sold small brown art prints of many of the great paintings, to take the place of the gaudy dust ladened chromos and family pictures.
Pictures are hung low that they may be thoroughly dusted, as well as to give a near view of the subject.
Expensive carpets are also things of the past. Painted and stained floors with light weight rugs are more generally used. These may be cleaned and handled without giving the backache to women. Many colored girls boast of having painted their own floors and woodwork. Much of this has been learned in the boarding school.
A tawdry home expresses its mistress as do her clothes.
Next to the kitchen a fully equipped bath room is now the most important room in the house. Health and sanitation are the topics of the hour and a colored girl should know how to put a washer on a faucet as well as her father or brother.
A house without books is indeed an unfurnished home. Good books are the fad now. They are everywhere in evidence in the up-to-date colored home. They are exhibited almost as hand painted china was. In every inventory or collection one finds a Bible, a dictionary, and an atlas.
The times are changing and the colored people are changing with the times. Cleanliness and health are the watchwords, and "Order" is Heaven's first law.
The Colored Working Girl Beautiful.
No one should ever scorn a colored working woman. She has been the bone and sinew of the race. She has built the churches, helped the schools and has made the race what it is. The pioneer colored woman in most instances has helped to make the wealth that many colored families enjoy, today.
In my travels, on entering Southern towns early in the morning, colored women are the only women seen on the streets, and sometimes the only persons. They hurry along often with insufficient clothing in cold and rain.
One thinks of the little ones at home who dress themselves and perhaps, younger children, all without a mother's care, until night when the tired woman's return to her home to cook, to wash and to iron for her family after a hard day's work, in service.
In the antebellum days some of the Negro working women may have been lazy but their descendants of today are not lazy—only fifty years after. Statistics prove how many homes have been bought through their labor, how many children are sent to school. Working women pay the family doctor bills, and support the churches and charities.
"Every person should work or else she will need a doctor." Habits affect looks. If one is energetic and happy in doing her work, her face will reflect the contentment. If one hates work, the face will reflect discontent, the vital organs will grow flabby and affect the health, and looks will suffer. Enthusiasm in work stimulates the vital organs, causes circulation of the blood and makes the eye bright and the skin to take on a more healthy hue.
If a girl is obliged to work in a kitchen she should respect her work and dignify her position. She may be a "Somebody" washing dishes or scrubbing a floor, if she does not depreciate her work and if she will give it status instead of half doing it and complaining about it.
Only a somebody "can" work well. We cannot get blood out of a turnip, and neither can a nobody "do" things. A slip-shod, half-hearted working woman is a curse to the race, because she gives it a bad reputation. She should put the "somebody" stamp on every portion of daily work and do the work as if she expected to get a diploma for it each night. She should not work mechanically or it will be drudgery. She should put pride and enthusiasm in her work, and let it reflect her inner self.
It is the duty of every working girl to make her employer adore her for her personal value and her word. "Do so much better work than you are paid to do that not only your employers, but their friends will take note and soon you will be paid for more than you do."
Be ready for the opportunity or crisis which is bound to come in a change for the better. Stick to a position like a leach. Make it a bigger and better one than you found it and it will prepare you for greater openings. Somebody is always watching good workers.
In her relationship with men the colored working girl beautiful will put a higher appraisement on herself than may be necessary in the case of the more fate-favored colored girl who stays under her parents' roof. Because she works is no reason why she should be cheap, easily attained, or easily pleased as far as men are concerned.
She will demand much instead of little from men, that they will offer more for the privilege of her society. Unless she is engaged she will be wise to permit no caresses and will try to conquer the tendency towards accepting "petting."
She will bide her time for the recognition of her worth. Many a servant girl has seen her posterity lead a town, socially.
To know how to wait is a great secret; to patiently bide the time when one may step into the niche that right living and preparation has made possible. She will try to be contented and will strive for power to conquer her work, and herself to be ready for the day when opportunity will open her door to a larger and more responsible life. The beautiful part about this is that she will be ready to fit into this new condition of life.
She should observe, listen and imitate the good when at work. Contact is often worth more than money. Many valuable lessons have been learned while "in service." While alone working one has opportunity to "think" and Thought rules the world.
A colored working girl is a racial trust. Her race burden is a heavy one. Her speech, actions and diligence constitute the measure by which the whole race is judged.
One need not permit previous family conditions or disadvantages of birth to hamper her progress in life. No matter what one's people have been or are, one is not to blame providing she rises above all of it.
She must "get up" and pull her family up after her, if she can. If this can not be done she can pull herself up—up—up and be the "somebody" in the family. She may grow in character, influence and reputation, until people will forget her ancestry and any objectionable relations as well as all former environment.
The Colored Working Girl Beautiful should not fear or worry about what people may think. She should save her money. A bank account is always the most respected thing in the struggle of life.
Even if some single black deed threatens to blot out the whole of a good life (in one's own case or in the estimate of the world) she should be brave enough to live it down. One should put her personality into everything she does and "do" things worth while. The world moves on so fast that even the bad is forgotten soon. One may live anything down nowadays if one tries.
If she may not go with good people socially, she should stay alone. In time she will make herself and others believe that this is her preference.
She should not push or try to climb; she should bide her time. In the meantime she might improve herself; she might study the piano, elocution or singing, and prepare for the day when opportunity will open the long-closed social door.
The Colored Woman Beautiful.
In spite of everything to be said on the subject the womanly woman is always the strongest magnet whether she is called beautiful or not.
If the colored girl has not been taught by her mother or guardian to train herself for a beautiful maturity even after she has passed girlhood, it is not too late to train herself.
Good begets good, so she will exert herself to make a wide circle of friends altho she will be careful not to grow too intimate with any. She may be a real friend without undue intimacy.
It is conceded that most women "must talk" to someone but too much intimacy means too much freedom and this often destroys friendship.
One cannot argue, quarrel, or criticize and still expect real friendship. One definition of a friend is, "One you know all about and still like." One should not try to "make her friends over" and one never says disagreeable things to her friends nor does she make unfavorable comments about their personal attire or weaknesses. She lets her friends learn all unpleasant things from others. "The links of the chain of friendship are held by a very delicate thread." The tiniest word, doubt or action may sever the links.